Well I have been procrastinating writing how I became a WAHM since I started this blog, so here it finally is!...
My husband and I were overjoyed when I became pregnant on our honeymoon...and terrified! We had both always wanted me to stay home with our kids, but since we got pregnant so soon we did not have the funds to make this possible. I finished my BA in English 2 weeks after our daughter, Genevieve, was born. So while I was pregnant I worried and planned and struggled to find the best compromise as to what I would do with my life after graduation since I knew I would have to work.
Since I was earning an English degree, and at the time the only term I associated with a freelance writer was a "starving artist," I decided as so many other English majors do, that I would go into teaching. To me this career seemed very family friendly, as I would have summers off...I thought I could birth all our kids in April, just as I did Genevieve, and get to spend the first 3 months of their life with them at home. I actually thought that I would be tired of taking care of a baby after 3 months and *want* to get back out in work, because 3 months was such a long time to be doing *nothing* all day, and plus I thought by 3 months babies were somewhat independent...HA! Mind you this was before I ever had a baby or even spent a day (or night) with a newborn! Thinking back and remembering my thought process is almost comical to me now...I was so naive.
So anyways I was going to be a teacher right? Well my husband and I decided that it would make sense for me to get my Master's degree in education, because of all the financial incentives our state offers for it, and the greater number of job opportunities available...plus (and this was my favorite part) for the first year of Genevieve's life, I could be home with her a lot more, because I would only have to go to class a few hours a day.
I felt pretty good about this plan all throughout my pregnancy, and even when she was first born. The first two months of summer were wonderful...I marveled at how beautiful she was and what a miracle having her in our lives was...I soaked up and enjoyed every moment of my brief SAHM-hood (stay at home mom - hood).
Then it grew closer to the time when I would have to go back to school...and I started dreading it. Every bone in my body instinctively told me not to leave her. Her 3 month birthday came and went and we were still attached at the hip! independent? ha! no...neither her or myself! I did not know what to do, I actually became a bit depressed, all I knew was I did not want to leave her...but felt there was nothing I could do, I felt trapped.
The first day of classes came...and I psyched myself up and said it was for the best, because I was going to help provide for my family. Luckily, at least my husband was able to watch her while I was gone. So I kissed both of them goodbye and told my husband to text me if there was any problem at all...he reassured me and I left.
I drove to school feeling pretty good, got there, went into class, looked around and found a seat..."Oh my phone!" I remembered, and took it out of my backpack, "just in case." well I opened it and there were 4 missed calls and a text from my husband that said "call now."
I ran out of the classroom in a daze, called my husband, and there was panic in his voice. My heart dropped, and I begged him to say everything was OK...he did once he calmed down and told me that right after I left he was walking down our stairs and fell while holding Genevieve...and she rolled down a couple steps! But she seemed OK, did not hit head or neck area..cried for 30 seconds then was back to her normal self...still I rushed home and we took her to our pediatrician, and of course, thank God, she was just fine.
But me...sadder than ever! How could I ever leave her again? I did not know, but had to...the next day at school I had to be gone for 6 hours...my Husband watched her, and she only ate about an ounce of the breastmilk I pumped for her...and screamed nearly the whole time. My breasts ached while I was in class as they were full of milk. She was nearly inconsolable when I got home, she breastfed for 3 hours because she was so hungry...my heart was breaking.
I grew to hate every moment I was away from her, over the span of a month it did not really get any better...I could not do it any longer. I knew women had to leave their babies all the time, but it seemed so unfair!!! Why? Babies and moms are meant to be together! I got angry and was determined to find a way I could stay home with her...
I considered all my options...I even applied to work in a daycare (at least we could be together that way), but ultimately decided that with my background freelance writing was the way to go. I applied to every decent paying job I could find, hoping to just bring in enough to get by. I was more determined to succeed in this than anything I had ever done before, because of the motivation I had.
To my surprise, I got more work than I could handle, and started making enough to make an actual living, not just supplementary pay so my husband and I could scrape by. It is very hard, to work while caring for a baby...frankly its exhausting! but soooooooooo worth it, Genevieve and I are happier than ever, and I am finally at peace with life once again.
I know Genevieve will get older, but my husband and I want a lot of kids...so while our kids are still young, I plan and only plan to be a WAHM...after that I am open to doing more, but honestly hope to make enough writing, where the pay i'de receive working for someone else would pale in comparison.
The reality is there is a ton of opportunity for moms out there looking to make money from home, the digital age has really changed the game, and had made legitimately WAHMing possible and lucrative!
My next part of my story is going to be details on how I found all my clients and work...i'll tell 'ya right now, it's no secret formula...just a lot of hard work and some great resources, that I will share on my next post...
right now Genevieve is waking from her nap...so duty calls!
Jessica
